How To Survive Your 40s

I’ve never written age-specific advice. I’ve read some on the subject, since age-advice is quite abundant. A lot of people come out with “Things I wish I knew in my 20s, What I’ve leaned when I turned 30, or 40, or whatever.” Some of these writers, both male and female, have sensible, good advice. The reason I’ve never written age-group advice is simple: I don’t believe in age, for men, at least, in the traditional sense. (men age like wine…)

Pamela Druckerman wrote an op-ed on May 4th, 2018, How to Survive your 40s and I thought I will title this post to match it. This is not age-related advice, it’s NOT specific for 40-year olds. What are some of the things Ms. Druckerman says ? (Ms. Druckerman is a writer in her 40s, living in Paris.)

“Forty isn’t even technically middle age anymore. Someone who’s now 40 has a 50 percent chance of living to 95, says the economist Andrew Scott, a co-author of “The 100-Year Life.”

But the number 40 still has symbolic resonance. Jesus fasted for 40 days. Muhammad was 40 when the archangel Gabriel appeared to him. The Israelites wandered the desert for 40 years. Mr. Brandes writes that in some languages, 40 means “a lot.”
And age 40 still feels pivotal. “The 40s are when you become who you are,” a British author in his 70s tells me, adding ominously, “And if you don’t know by your 40s, you never will.”

I personally disagree with that British author, there is crystallization in your 40s, but no more, or less than is in your 30s (when compared with your 20s). There’s probably a lot of people out there who agree 40s is the apex for a man in terms of earning power, stability, etc. Is it ?

“But there are upsides, too. What we lack in processing power we make up for in maturity, insight and experience. We’re better than younger people at grasping the essence of situations, controlling our emotions and resolving conflicts. We’re more skilled at managing money and explaining why things happen. We’re more considerate than younger people. And, crucially for our happiness, we’re less neurotic.”

The author is baffled of being called “Madame” instead of “Mademoiselle”, which is essentially the age report society brings on you. I say: Call me Sir, whether I’m 25 or 33 or 40 or 60“.

Quote of the day: “Where the Jedi gained power through understanding, the Sith gain understanding through power.” -Emperor Palpatine, Star Wars: Dark Lord: The Rise of Darth Vader- James Lucerno

“We’ve actually managed to learn and grow a bit. We see the hidden costs of things. Our parents have stopped trying to change us. We can tell when something is ridiculous. And other minds are finally less opaque. The seminal journey of the 40s is from “everyone hates me” to “they don’t really care.

“Even so, the decade is confusing. We can finally decode interpersonal dynamics, but we can’t remember a two-digit number. We’re at or approaching our lifetime peak in earnings, but Botox now seems like a reasonable idea. We’re reaching the height of our careers, but we can now see how they will probably end.” No, you can’t. Are the 40s “lacking in milestones” as compared with your 20s and 30s ?” –she writes.

Why should those years be lacking in milestones, unless you’ve made that choice. If you went to college and graduated at age 40 or 50, it’s less exciting, rewarding, and meaningful ? Who says so ? I tell who does -society -and its need. Its need to put you in a box. You can decode personal dynamics if you are 22 years of age and are reading me.

Rise to the occasion tomorrow on better grounds. My 10 Boss Maxims are shot straight from the hip.

10 maxims for today:

1. Wealth is no wisdom to the mistakes of the young.

2. Always take care of yourself first.

3. When you’re older, don’t forget to clear out your list of Boogeymen. Have no Boogey Men in your closet.

4. You have a lot of enemies. No, you have more enemies than that.

5. Youth is not a virtue. Why place so much value in something people who have it don’t respect ? It ain’t worth shit. Just ask a 20-year old.

6. Words to delete from your vocabulary: hope and fear. They are synonyms.

7. When your lady [wife/woman] hits the wall, she hits you first.

8. Men blossom continuously. It’s not a one-season (Spring) thing. I don’t know whom nature gave the job of creation, I suspect it’s men.

9. Mistakes are the signs of a high-value man.

10. Money can solve all of the problems that it hasn’t created.

Stuff even a 70-year old can take to the bank.

It seems some readers have decided today is Taco Tuesday (that’s when you get two tacos for the price of one). Even though it is not Tuesday, I got more maxims to get this barbecue going.

12. Men are built for sex, while women are built for reproduction. There’s a big difference between the two.

13. The most overrated quality in the world is niceness. I talk about it a lot in the future book, a book I decided to dedicate to Spartacus. Spartacus quote: “I rather favor him” -Sephia, of Spartacus, whom was spoken as “an animal and a savage” in Roman male governor cycles.

14. When the enemy is restless, he is weak. It is the time to double down on him.

15. “Once you let mofos slide one time, they start to think they can ice skate.” -Unknown (Blade ?)

16. “This world is filled with the grotesque and the divine,
       You can’t have one absent the other.” -Cossitius

17. There is no such thing as an alpha female. 

18. The moment you hesitate, the charm is broken.

19. “Where the speech is corrupted, the mind is also.” -Seneca

20. Fear of spiders is called arachnophobia.
      Fear of Max Cantor is called fear of lifting the heavy weight.