“According to experts at the university’s Center for Advanced Research on Language Acquisition, two thirds of the time, Americans respond to compliments with something other than, or in addition to, “Thank you.” We shift credit (“My mom picked this dress out for me.”), make a historical comment (“I bought it on sale.”), question the complimenter (“Hmm, you think so?”) or lob back a compliment (“I like your outfit, too.”). Other times we downgrade the compliment (“This thing is so old I was about to give it to Goodwill.”), reject it outright (“I feel like I look like a hobo.”) or treat the compliment as a request (“You want to borrow it?”).” -Carolyn Bucior

Ms. Bucior seems to think “the compliment is a coded invitation to chitchat, and simply saying, “Thank you” linguistically slams the door in the complimenter’s face.” She shuns the simple, yet wholesome “Thank you” for reason of shutting down on chitchat/conversation.

She is wrong. Of course, I don’t write about women codes or coquetry. I write about a winner’s etiquette.

The smart way, my way, is exactly that “Thank you !” without any explanation or reciprocation. Do not reciprocate, not because you are rude or lacking manners. There is subtle exchange of energy your way when complimented you are throwing to the garbage when you respond on automatic reciprocating with a compliment or explanation. They don’t teach you that at Harvard. Old wolves know it. You now know it, too. Accept the compliment wholeheartedly, openly (always accept, again, don’t ignore). Do not dismiss or look down upon the compliment. In fact, we should say “Thank you” more often than we do, such as when catching the train or subway on time. You can accept it with a smile and say nothing. Or say “Thank you”. The conversation can still go on if the complimenter follows with an opening story. What’s important here is to accept the compliment fully, without excuses or remarks.

Quote of the day:
“When passion for vengeance overtakes caution, even the keenest of mind is easily deceived.” -Solonius , Spartacus, The Bitter End

Reading today: Cricket flour: is this the next thing for your health ? Boss Magazine

Whole issue for those that are interested